Rivers of Transition
The turning over of a new year did not have to wait any longer. It's as if the fluorescent carpet has absorbed back the colors of a vibrant season and the air is busy with people running around, scrambling after work left over from the holidays. No time to let any of it sink in, to let the Christmas wine swish around the tongue one last time, in the hopes of that significant flavor magically resurfacing from under the bitterness.
Everything seems to move too fast nowadays. You either push yourself harder to swim with the currents, or be swift enough to latch onto some huge log the currents picked up along the way. You can't just float idly without the risk of being plummetted against the rampaging debris, or getting shoved into a bunch of rocks in the middle of a river whenever it suddenly makes a sharp turn.
I'd like to believe it is just these responsibilities pouring in as a sign of a maturing age, and not so much that man's advancement and picked-up pace took everything else with it. However, it is both. Everybody's bending over to make a living and in the process start forgetting what it's like to live.
I feel like I'm being left behind. Is it childish to want to stop for a while and catch up with what I have missed? Reconnect with the loved ones whom I did not have the chance to celebrate my triumphs together? Relish the irreplaceable quality time I would have spent without worrying about unfinished business, or take a step back so I would not leave the important parts of myself behind.
Or should I forget all such naivety and move on to the sure path of career and ambition, the last step before the final form of a true-blue adult?
Yes, I do have so much in store for myself and the people I aim to include in this future. I do have dreams and I am not getting any younger. But everybody's more forgiving towards you when you're younger, and the room for error shrinks as each last month of the calendar tears off.
There seems to be a standard timeline segregated by age, which in turn is accentuated by major milestones. Not only proposed and rubberstamped by society, but somehow also by biology. It says that by this time I should be focusing my energy on building up my stability in finances, which, in line with my personal time frame, should be aiming for a stable job, a good company of lifelong friends, a budding career, photo albums of trips and getaways, a nice car, a spacious house, a partner. And the list goes on...
I just hope that in doing so I won't neglect anything along the way, or suddenly realize I have left something big behind and I no longer have the time to make a 180-degree turn. Or perhaps, having something to go back to.
I should take care that this pearl necklace won't get snagged and get torn at the string lest the beads trickle down and I trip over or crush one in the process of running after them. After all, given the knowledge that pearls are expensive jewelry, even Nature spent a great deal of time in the creation of precious stones.